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Female Fantasies

Sophie asks if female fantasies are normal for most women. She has always had fantasies about both men and women. Sharing these fantasies with her partner would really turn her on, but should she tell him about them?

Female Fantasies Question

Abby,

I have a question about female fantasies. I've always had fantasies. During intercourse, I fantasize about sex with other men. When I masturbate I fantasize about experimenting with other girls. Is this normal? Should I tell my boyfriend of 2 years? It would turn me on to tell him, but I'm afraid he'll get the idea that it opens doors to having sex with other people. We only have sex with each other, but I'm still afraid. What should I do? I don't want a sexual relationship with anyone else, I just love the forbidden fantasies.

Thanks,
Sophie


Answers about Female Fantasies

Dear Sophie,

It is very common for women to have male and female fantasies during sex and masturbation. Fantasies enhance sexual pleasure and as long as you don't make fantasies really happen, no one gets hurt. For example, having sex with other people is a common fantasy, but going out and actually doing it can seriously damage or ruin relationships.

As far as your boyfriend, just tell him exactly what you want and what you don't want. Make sure you say you don't really want to have sex with other people or whatever it is you don't want to do in real life. Tell him how much it would turn you on to share your fantasies with him, and be clear if you don't want to actually make fantasies into real events. Ask if he'd like to hear your fantasies (I bet he would love it), and once you two know that you're thinking along the same lines, then go have some fun together.

Thanks for your email about fantasies and let me know if you have any other questions.

Always,
Abby

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